GCB: Season Finale

Carlene invites the gang to Juarez for the opening of her new condos. Amanda doesn't want to go, even though Pastor Tudor, asks her to. She wants to surprise Luke. When she gets to his house she finds out he is already in Juarez, so she joins along. Cricket has been playing games with Mr. Masey and introduces him to Blake before they take off. He apparently knows about her husband being gay.

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Once in Mexico, they get to a little shop where they try to buy this face cream. Zack and Sharon have been getting offers to buy their company. She says no, she wants to keep running it, but all he can think about is money. At the end he finally accepts an offer for $20mil. Turns out the parent company is owned by Crickett.

Amanda and Gigi go to find Luke and instead see Rip there with a girl who he is hugging. They go back to the ground breaking and all the guys leave with Pastor Tudor to run errands and the girls get kidnapped and brought to a broken down warehouse. The lady who is there wants Carlene off their land. She takes the dead out of her hand and leaves them there with no food, water or transportation. They only have a bottle of tequila that Sharon bought. Walking through the desert they drink the tequila for sustenance. Amanda even indulges and falls off the wagon.

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They are rescued finally and Amanda has a fight with Luke. She shows Carlene the woman that Rip was hiding and we find out that is his daughter. But with whom? Did he cheat?

Amanda ends up drunk at the bar with Pastor Tudor and they make out. Scandalous!

Will it return for another season?

GCB: BBQ

The church does their annual BBQ and Amanda wants to start an all girls team. Sharon decides to join in after realizing that Zach auctioned off a car for the prize. She says if they win, she gets the car no questions asked. Carlene does all in her power not to let Amanda win, by stealing all the wangus (Wagu and Angus) meat. She then realizes that Rip is not letting her build her condos, but wants them in Mexico, she goes to Amanda's team as well. Heather falls in love with the local butcher (played by crossover from True Blood) and they end up winning the competition.

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Meanwhile, Cricket, wants to buy a horse to mate with hers. She asks this guy with money (crossover Ugly Betty) and they have chemistry. She realizes she might want more than what Blake gives her.

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Something shady is going on with Luke as in the last scene he is in Mexico scouting someone out, but who?

GCB: Mud Fight

I have to say that this episode was better than all the rest so far this season. Let's begin, shall we?

Amanda, who is still working for Pastor Tudor, decides to help him with the church musical just to upstage the other pastor who was trying to make him look bad. She enlists Heather as the writer, since she wrote a play in high school, and does an open casting. She puts the past behind her and old Amanda to rest as she casts Carlene as the lead, Cricket as the leper, Rip as Jesus and Blake as another leper. Cricket is appalled that she didn't get the lead, after a really great sing off between her and Carlene. She refuses to be in the play or share her lighting and wires that help the spirit fly. They cast Sharon's son, Bozeman (horrible names) to be the leper instead.

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Sharon has been promoting her Lose it with Jesus business. She is set to go on a Texas cable access show to promote. She seeks GiGi's help to make her over. She makes her pin back the Sharon curl, take out the twang in her voice, talk a voice level octave lower and not be herself. When she goes on as this, she sells nothing. Once she becomes herself again she sells 500 meals plans ($1200 a piece!). She then realizes that this means 500 plans for a whole month, that is a lot of cooking!

During the rehearsals, Amanda decides to amp this up and she needs the lights and other things. She begs Cricket to come back as the leper, but the lead. Cricket says that she is on a bamboo and water cleanse, lol. Carlene then threatens Heather to get her back as the lead. This turns into one big fight and they are all mad at Amanda. She acts like high school Amanda and everybody walks out.

She decides to put on her uniform and let the girls throw mud at her to get things out. They do and then throw mud at each other. I love it. They realize they need to let the show go on and put their differences behind them.

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They put the show on and its really great. Until its time for the spirit, Carlene, to fly. They never recalibrated the wires to fit her and she goes flying as she breaks the stained glass window. The other pastor tapes the whole thing. The crowd cheers and they did a great show. Amanda is finally thanked, but the girls bow in front of her so nobody can see her. Guess they aren't over it just yet!

Cute!

GCB: Double Episode

We have back to back episodes which helped fill my Sunday night. Let's begin, shall we?

Part One:

Carlene is having her annual vow renewal ceremony. Sharon is so excited that she gets to be the matron of honor, complete with parasol. It is a Gone with the wind themed wedding. Luke, who will be the best man, must got with a wedding attendant and not Amanda. So Carlene decides to ask Amanda to be the maid of honor so she can go with Luke. She has to plan the bridal shower (a rod and staff themed party) and the bacherlorette party (a girls getaway weekend). She messes up the shower, by giving her a vibrator. Then the bachelorette party she thinks is a Vegas trip, but instead its a hunting one. While out hunting, her and Carlene fight and she ends up dropping her gun which automatically shoots her in the but. She is ok though.

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Meanwhile, Heather is trying to get back into the good graces of the girls. She is trying a bit hard if you ask me. Sharon lets it slip that Luke has brought a different girl to this ceremony for the past 16 years as the curse. Luke tells Amanda he got so stoned at the first one, he lost the marriage license. Carlene finds out and we realize she was never married. She tries to eat her 17 year old wedding cake and throw out her dress. Amanda tries to help and finds the certificate in the old cake box. She tries to get the guy there to help her and does so by showing her boobs. They are married, they ceremony takes place and Amanda and Luke give it another try. Woo hoo!

Part Two:

Pastor Tudor has a conversation with Amanda that leads him to try something new. He also asks her to be his assistant at the church. He tells her that the women scare him. The new sermon is all about the goodness of sex. He tells everyone they should go out, if they are married or a couple only, and have lots of sex. This causes a lot of problems out there.

Blake asked Cricket to have another baby. Since he is gay, they thought they would have a surrogate, and she doesn't want to give up sushi or alcohol. They keep interviewing people and although they love one girl, she worked for Obama. Texas is a huge republican state, so she is out. They think about having it themselves, but they are not attracted to each other that way and they start giggling through it. In the end, they watch Spartacus and that gets them both off and they do it.

Sharon and Zach are having sex all over the house. After sex he gets talky and ends up telling her that his business is going down. She tells him about these Jesus meals that helped her lose weight. In the end, he loses weight as well and says that will be their new business called "losing it with Jesus". yikes.

Carlene tries to kick out the mothers who milk group from the church to have her sex is bad seminars. She wants to show that sex is bad and she doesn't do such a good job. Her and Amanda catch Carlene's son and Amanda's daughter hooking up in the back. They swap and tell each other's child stories. Amanda talks about getting pregnant young and Carlene talks about different partners and horror stories. They are scared straight after that.

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Meanwhile, Burl proposes to Gigi and she says she needs to think about it. She ends up accepting and they live in this big old fancy house that Heather finds them.

GCB: Amanda's New Boyfriend

Amanda gets into a car accident on her way to Bitsy's funeral. It's with this super hot guy and she wants to repay him, but he gets her name and license number and drives away. His pants fall out the window. She gets to the funeral and Carlene is upset because Crickett is singing, not her. Her version of Amazing Grace was hysterical. When Amanda sees the hot guy again sans pants, she gives them to him and finds out he is Luke, Carlene's baby brother. Uh oh.

Meanwhile, Sharon is all annoying and on top of Pastor Tudor. She is linting him, dressing him, printing his speech, being wanted. Zack is unhappy she is not being a wife and mother, so he pulls his son out of boarding school to bring them together. Although he is a wild child and ends up getting caught doing it with Crickett's daughter Alexandra on a tour bus. Pastor Tudor ends up telling her to go home to her family and they end up patching things up, once Zack takes a firm hand with his boy.

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Heather is being extra showy with her boyfriend. She wants to welcome him and his company to town and throw him a party, but the girls remind her she only has a condo and that wont work. They end up convincing him to go to the church fundraiser instead. She doesn't want Carlene or Crickett to sing, so he lets her drop his name to get Sheryl Crow to perform. She does and its a hit and they raise 3million for the church, but she drops his name too much and he leaves her, because he thinks she is using him not for him.

Amanda goes on a date with Luke to boobyliscious and they have a really great time together. It ends at her house with a handshake, weird. But Gigi and Burl have a great time together too. They end up kissing at his wife's funeral and then in her red cloak and his hat they do it in the bushes. Carlene catches them and sends a cop car on them. She tells Amanda, if she stops seeing Luke, she wont tell anyone about Gigi. She does and she is upset.

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Gigi ends up making a scene at the fundraiser announcing she loves Burl and kisses him. Amanda ends up telling Luke the truth about his sister and they end up together.

Cute episode and cute guy to fawn over, but still nothing substantial. Do you think this show will last?

GCB: Westward Ho!

Even though this show is corny, I need something to fill my DVR with all of my shows on hiatus. I actually have NOTHING on Monday's especially when CBS is running reruns. So thank heavens for GCB! Let's begin...

Sunday mass has brought all sorts of surprises. First, an old flame of Gigi's comes into town. It is Carlene's uncle Burl. Gigi is excited, but not happy to see his wife Bitsy (her mortal frenemy, who played Jane's real mom on Melrose Place) Gigi says she is going to throw Burl a welcome home party. It will be a come dress as your favorite Texan theme party. Bitsy wants to dress up as Barbara Bush and asks Gigi to be Laura Bush, all demure and not sexy. She agrees to make Burl happy after they share a tender moment outside her house that Bitsy sees.

Also at mass, Blake sees how well Amanda wears a pair of pants and asks her to come work with him and Cricket at their fashion company. She agrees and comes up with a great idea to revamp their Westward Ho jeans line. Crickett agrees and Amanda does a photo shoot with the boobyliscious girls. Some anonymous blogger lordlover puts a post up about how corrupt this is with the word HO and some of the stores pull out of the fashion company. Amanda feels bad and wants to leave the company. Meanwhile, she asks Andrew (Heather's new boyfriend) to dig in to who is this blogger. She comes up with an idea to make it Westward Hosanna, so that they don't get into trouble.

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Sharon and Zack are having marital problems and pastor Tudor wants to help. He tells them to switch lives for a few days. Zack will watch their daughter and cook and clean and she will do the man things around the house. She tries to build a shelf for him and breaks her manicure. She finally figures it out and does a great job. Zach isn't doing so hot as he is eating off paper plates and making microwave pizza. The daughter wants home cooked meals. They realize they love each other and she dresses up like Ana Nicole. He asks her to cook for him and then she is not happy again.

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Heather is trying to get Andrew to stay in Texas but there isn't a plot of land big enough for him. She overhears Burl has a 500 acre land, but Carlene wants it for herself. She convinces Burl that he cant give it to Carlene and gets it for Andrew. He buys her a pair of earrings to celebrate, and she is dressed like Selena. Carlene is less than happy. Carlene has been trying to break into Amanda's home (even gets her a manicure session with her girl Champagne) but steals the computer finally. Then feels bad. She even catches her son whacking it to a Westward Ho ad. She talks to Amanda about it (she is dressed like Farrah Fawcett) and Amanda admits that Bill is dead and she saw the body in the morgue and at the open casket funeral. Maybe they will make up?

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We finally find out who the blogger was and it was Crickett. She jeopardized her own company just to get Amanda and Blake to stop working together. Knowing that he is gay, it was threatening their best friendship. Gigi and Amanda have a heart to heart at the party. After Gigi decides to not be nice to Bitsy because Bitsy is going to take Burl away when he shouldn't be traveling and dress as her favorite Texan, herself. Bitsy chokes on a rib and nobody sees. Crickett and Blake discover her and the episode ends.

What did you think? Was this episode a bit better? Do you have high hopes for Carlene and Amanda to be friends?

GCB: Single

Another fluffy episode.

Carlene and Rip are having problems in the bedroom. He cant get it up. She calls Crickett and asks for advice. Crickett has been getting some from her pilates instructor. He is getting engaged so he cant do that with her anymore. She decides to send them a gift and then destroy their buisnesses. Meanwhile, Sharon has been too upset with her husband for kissing Amanda but refuses to say anything in fear he will leave her. She even calls the national chili line and gets advice for not only her recipe but her marriage.

Carlene tries to dress up as Adam and Eve to shake things up in the bedroom, but that doesn't work. Rip is too obsessed with Amanda's secrets and her dead husbands. She goes to see Cricket's Tai Kwon Do instructor to release her tension. She asks him for the Cricket special and he starts to take off his pants and she kicks him in the groin.

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A new pastor is in town and he tells Sharon, Carlene and Crickett that they are model marriages. He wants them to speak at his Christian singles night. Heather is buying cake and wine for a guy she knew in high school that she never spoke to who is back in town. He is a billionaire. She goes to see him and they have an awkward flirty glass of wine and she knocks his tooth out with her head.

Gigi is trying to get Amanda to date, but she says its too soon. She gets a package from the US Marshalls that has their family photo and a note from Bill the day he ran off asking to forgive him. Heather makes her come with her to Christian Singles night at the church. Amanda agrees to go in, just to help Heather get her guy.

Once there, the three couples are also there to help guide the singles. They are split into two groups. The one led by Rip and Carlene are for those who has been married before. The one led by Crickett and Blake are for those who have never been married. Sharon and her husband are making dinner in the kitchen. Amanda is in Rips group and he is busy trying to get her secrets. They make these men and women pinatas and fill it with secrets and things they want to say to them and are supposed to bust it down.

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The other group has Heather in it and they are making fires with their old lovers names in them and are burning them. Carlene confronts Blake about Crickett's infidelity. He says to Crickett that now everyone will know. They have been using their marriage as a business to keep his secret that he is gay. He knows she cheats and she knows he is gay. She tells him she is upset she has to keep this secret.

In the kitchen Sharon takes a bite of the super hot chili (her husband tosses in all the pepper) and Amanda withholds the milk until she admits to him why she is upset. She previously confronted Amanda in boobyliscious to stay away from her husband and calls her a Jezebel.

The fire alarm goes off and the dolls are not hit. Rip gives Amanda her doll and leaves. Heather and the new guy kiss and go home together. At home, he tells Carlene he has been distracted since he invested millions with Bill Vaughn and he thought Amanda knew where it could be. They do it and then open her secret doll. They think that Bill is still alive as they plot. Sharon and her husband dont make up, but she throws her ice cream in the garbage. Maybe she will slim down. Blake and Crickett love their arrangement and she feels the remote and mistakes it for you know what.

Back at home, Gigi helps Amanda hit her pinata Bill doll. She feels better and says she is ready to date. Yahoo.

I think this show will get cancelled, what are your thoughts?

GCB: Havalinas

OK I watched again, but in my defense a lot of my shows are on hiatus and I need something to fill this void! Read on, please...

Carlene was so upset about being out last week as the owners of boobyliscious, she thought about not singing at church today. After all of her friends denied that they would come over, she gave in when Cricket said she would take her place. She sang at church about Jesus taking the wheel. Amanda took it at as a jab at her since her husband died in a fiery car crash.

Gigi is throwing a coming out party for Amanda, since she never had one. Heather is helping to organize it since Gigi was such a second mother to her growing up. The girls are less than happy about Heather's involvement in Amanda's life. Amanda wants to make sure her and her kids stay grounded. She refuses to let them accept fancy gifts from Neiman's from her mother. She wants to shop at a trendy discount store. She realizes that her maid is wearing the same thing as her daughter.

When Amanda was Queen Bee she started a trend by making the ugly girls Havalinas (pigs) and dousing them with mud before the pep rally and the pretty girls foxes, dousing them with glitter. She realizes that her daughter got branded a Havalina and doesn't want that for her. The daughters of Cricket and Sharon say how they want to brand her one and how Cricket's daughter got a C cup with last year's uniform. Cricket wants Blake to be there to watch but he says he has to go to the ranch rodeo with his 80 men. I have this feeling she knows he is gay, especially since he picks out her outfits and they sleep on opposite sides of a California King size bed.

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Amanda tells Cricket she wants to meet her to has things out. They drive 80 miles away for pulled pork and talk about how Cricket thanks her for branding her a havalina. Without that she wouldn't have changed her whole face and became beautiful. She then leaves Amanda there to get a ride in the back of a truck. She tries to call her daughter to warn her about going to the pep rally, but the phone has no reception.

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At the pep rally, Cricket's daughter busts open her top and everyone sees her breasts. Blake shows up late. Amanda gets there and realizes her daughter got glittered not doused with mud. They decided not to keep the trend going to her daughter. They also don't let Heather into the private tent. Especially after they were bad mouthing Amanda to the old ladies and Heather stood up for her. Sharon also finds out that her husband kissed Amanda and throws cotton candy on him.

At Boobyliscious, Kitten decides to make over their image. She puts them in these ridiculous uniforms that cover them all up. She decides to take matters into her own hands and tell Rip that they all quit if they make them cover up. He decides to let them back into their old uniforms and tells Kitten to stay out of it, that this is man's work. Amanda puts a bible quote on the back of their uniforms and her mother brings all the ladies there for her coming out luncheon. She tells her she is proud of her and they hug.

Ehhhh. I don't see this show getting picked up again for another season. Cute, but way too vapid, even for me. I just like to pretend I live in Dallas and have a key to Neimans :)

GCB Premiere: Hope Floats

I have to say, I originally was not going to watch this show. I am not from the south and I cannot connect with this concept. However, knowing that most of my shows are ending or going into spring finales, I need something to fill my DVR and my blog. Let's begin, shall we?

I have to say this show is a raunchier version of the movie Hope Floats. Have you ever seen it? Sandra Bullock and her daughter move back home to the south after she finds out that her husband is cheating on her and divorcing her. She tries to find her way, living with her mother again and falling in love with town cowboy. Swoon. This was an amazing movie. GCB is like this, but with more lies, cattiness and flashiness. Read on...

GCB (Good Christian Bitches/Belles) is about Amanda Vaughn, played by Leslie Bibb (Popular, The Skulls, Shopaholic) Her husband ran a ponzi scheme in California, took all of the money and his new girlfriend (her old bestie) to run off. She was giving him oral in the car and they crashed and both died. Amanda's house goes into foreclosure and she loses everything, so her and her two kids pack it up to move back to Dallas, Texas with her mother, Annie Potts (Designing women). Her mother is all about the flash and glitter and wants her to readjust to her lifestyle here.

The girls she went to high school with are all but less than pleased to have the school mean girl back in their midst. Carlene "Kitten" (Kristen Cheowerth, Wicked) hates her the most. She lives across the street and is always wearing her Loubs and looking out her telescope. She had some major plastic work done on her and looks completely different. Amanda had her kicked off the cheerleading team for bad skin, Sharon (who was super skinny, now fat) Amanda told everyone she wasn't a virgin and ruined her chance of Miss Teen Dallas, Amanda stole her now dead husband from Cricket by telling everyone she had herpes and finally Heather, who was the lonely poor girl now sells million dollar homes and is the only big name in real estate.

Her mother wants her back into society, so she tells her they need to go to church. Carlene makes sure to call her out at church. While at church she runs into all the men who used to fawn all over her. Cricket's husband Blake was her bestie, Sharon's husband Zack, is in love with her and so are his kids and the rest of the men just love her. She even gets a Mercedes delivered to her house from a secret admirer. She wants none of this attention, so asks to  have it sent back. She even gets $98K worth of clothes from Neimans delivered to her house (Neiman's HQ is in Texas) and she has it returned, all left on a gift card for her to spend.

She tries to get a job, but nobody will hire her because the girls have everyone in the town helping them. She even wants to move out after her mother tries to get her daughter with big hair and big boobs and making her son mix cocktails. She goes to Heather, but she shows her the crappiest houses. She does her own online search and finds good ones and confronts Heather. She tells Heather she is sorry and she has changed, she takes light to her and wants to be friends. The other girls not so much.

from abc.com

Amanda goes to the car dealership to see who bought the car and Sharon's husband tries to make out with her. Carlene sees this and thinks Amanda is evil. Amanda gets a job being a waitress at boobyliscious. She meets Blake for drinks and notices that he is rubbing legs with his ranch hand and that he is gay.

The girls come over with a fake welcome basket for her in order to get more info. They steal the Neiman's card and try to go to the store to see who bought it. The guy asks for ID and Sharon runs out, but the security camera gets it all. Amanda learns of this. She finds out from her mother that she was the one who sent her the car and the clothes. Amanda decides to go to the Longhorn ball with an outfit sent by Blake.

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When she is there, none of them are too happy. A photo of her in her waitress outfit gets out and Carlene makes it a point to tell her she needs to set a better example. Amanda runs out of the dance but goes to church the next day. She says a prayer out loud and realizes her check is from the Kitten Corp, which owns the titty bar and she publicly thanks god for her new job as a waitress and thanks Carlene who owns the company. Right back in her place.

from abc.com

I still do not love this show, but its something light and airy to fill a time slot for me. What did you think of the premiere? Will you be watching on Sunday nights?