Keeping up with the Kardashians: Season Finale

And we are here folks. We start back with Khloe who learns she is not ovulating. She needs to start being on hormones to make her ovulate. She breaks it to Lamlam and he is the sweetest about it. Sucks they wasted 2 years trying! Kim also wants to freeze her eggs. She even has her mom inject her with hormones. Yikes.

Bruce is going to be honored for being a decathlete and Brandon and Brody come too. He is upset though that Kendall and Kylie did not come. Brandon tells them to appreciate their father and his accomplishments more. They end up buying tickets to go to the Olympics with him to London. He is overjoyed!

Kourt has her baby shower. Kanye is there with some babies and Khloe gives him the pep talk. Mason has a cute scene with the sprinklers and even Kris tells Scott what a good dad he is. The girls open their new dash store on Melrose and say that Miami needs some help. They make fun of Rob's attire.

It's time for the birth! They are off to the hospital and Kourtney wants the drugs. She gets them and she pulls her own baby out of her. That's nuts! I have never seen that before. She calls her Penelope Scotland, interesting. Mason is cute with her and calls her sister. Kourtney and Kim return in January for Miami 2013! How she will do this with two kids, I have no clue!

Keeping Up with the Kardashians: Vasectomy

Kourtney is getting the house ready and a flushable special toilet for new baby girl's room. It's all decked in orange Hermes. She wants to know how many more kids they can fit in their house. Scott is upset so he researches a vasectomy. He tells Rob, who tells Kourt and they fight over it. I agree that this is the only power he will ever get, to stop giving her kids.

Kris is getting a breast reduction. During this time, Kendall and Kylie try to coerce her to borrow things in the closet. The go in there all the time. Kris gets wise to it (after she tries to get everyone to touch her breasts) and locks the closet. Now they must sign in and take a photo of things they want to borrow. Yikes! They are spoiled though.

Kim wants to research freezing her eggs and makes Khloe come with. She finds out that she is not ovulating, which in turn means she cannot have kids. She needs to start thinking about other options like surrogates and things and she just cries. I feel horrible for her.

Keeping up with the Kardashains: Continued

Still in therapy, Rob admits he just wants his family to be happy. Of course Kim has to  make this all about her and cry too. She discredits Khloe by saying she was the only one who worked in her dad's office. She is rude to everyone and writes an email hoping that will fix it.

Kendall and Kylie are not happy because they miss too much school. They beg to be home schooled, but Kris doesn't listen. I agree with Kris, but then again, I don't know how a Hollywood star in school does it. Maybe they need a tutor/homeschooling. In the end, they meet with the homeschooling and agree on it.

They decide to help Rob with a Kardashain's men line that he brings Scott aboard for. He shows up to the meeting in a hoodie and sweats. How unprofessional? He really doesn't care and thinks that everything should be handed to him. They get the meeting and possibly the deal. Maybe next time he will clean up!

Kim says she wants to go with Khloe and Lamar to Queens to visit his hometown. She tells her not to be so glammed up and she takes it too far. They go there and go to a local music store and get to see where he came from. Kris Humphries is asking Kanye to testify and things are not over there yet.

Keeping up with the Kardashians: Family Therapy

We start off with Kanye redesigning Kim's whole closet. She basically throws all of her clothes out and gets new ones that he picked out for her. I hate how she always changes herself for a guy. I don't even like the new clothes that he picked out for her. It gets even worse, she says she wants to do her own line of lingerie and sisters are not happy about this. She doesn't like their ideas for their makeup line and doesn't want the name Kardashian on it. She always gets the most attention and everyone is a bit annoyed with it.

They meet with Oprah and get down to the nitty gritty as the whole family takes pictures with her and Rob feels even more left out.

Meanwhile, we have some cute scenes with little Mason and Scott being a daddy. Let's get some shrimp and rice and then hit the pool. Sounds like a plan to me!

Finally, Kris says they should all go to therapy together. While there they discuss the obvious that Kim is the favorite and Rob gets no attention. He busts out into tears because his life is going nowhere. I feel bad for him, but he really needs to step out on his own.

Keeping Up with the Kardashians: Burial Plots

A bit morbid episode. We start off with Kris deciding she wants a mausoleum for the Jenner/Kardashian/Odum/Disick brood. She takes them to Hollywood Forever and has them pick out their final resting places. I think she goes a bit too far at the casket place when she actually lays in one. Rob and Khloe tell her she is going overboard and she realizes maybe she is.

Meanwhile, two fish have been bought for Mason by the aunts and Kourtney is not happy. She doesn't want to teach him about death yet. When they die, she replaces them and even gets a huge tank with filter, but no luck. Eventually they just die.

Kim finds out that Khloe will be the guardian of little Mason and is upset. She thinks she should be since she sees him more. But I have to agree with Kourtney on this one. She wants someone who has a stable home to be with him.

Next week - Oprah!

Keeping Up with the Kardashians: Water Birth

We start off with Kourt and Scott doing some prenatal yoga and some Kegels. She wants to get a cast of her belly made. Then she wants to look into water birth at home. She is invited to see a live one. Khloe goes with her and they experience the screaming and the pain she goes through and the little one is born. Horrible. I could not watch too much of this, seeing that in 5 months I will be giving birth as well.

Meanwhile, Kim wants to visit her grandma MJ, but mommy Kris wont go. She is too scared. They all finally go (and little Mason) to see her. They have a great time and Kris realizes that her mom may not be around forever so she decides to make more of an effort to see her. MJ has survived breast and colon cancer. They go to the zoo with little Mason and he gets to see the tigers.

Bruce has been hitting Kris in his sleep so he goes with son Brandon (doesn't he have something else to do? Where is Brody!?) to a sleep clinic. He finds out that he is always flailing his left arm. So he decides to sleep with a sling on his arm so he can sleep next to his wife.

Keeping up with the Kardashians: Reconnecting

We leave off with Kris talking to Todd. He flirts with her and she kind of blows it off, he is not happy. He thought he was getting some. Sorry Toddy. She goes back home to tell Bruce and is mad that he is mad. She keeps telling him its a good thing she went behind his back and lied to him and saw her ex, because she loves him. Yeah she is totally warped!

from ology.com

Meanwhile, Kim has ESP, she can smell cavities. She makes Lammy go to the dentist. While there they realize he has cavities and needs a root canal. They put him under, pull out his decayed tooth and clean him up. He is so loopy and happy his mouth is clean, he calls the dentist his BFF and wants to come back every week.

Kim tells Rob his hair is thinning so he gets all paranoid, sees a doc and gets some special brush to help prevent. He realizes his hair is fine after seeing pics of his grandpa and moves on.

Kris goes to tell the girls, but doesn't want to tell Kourtney about Todd. They insist she takes a lie detector test. She admits Kim is her favorite and says that she did not cheat and does not love Todd. They decide to send Kris and Bruce away to Malibu to rekindle their romance. While there, they don't and they are separate until they flip through a photo album with photos of them from the past 20 years loving each other. They kiss and makeup and even do it.

Keeping up with the Kardashians: Cheaters

Kris invites Lance Bass over for dinner and Bruce refuses to get dressed. Rob is on the hunt for a house and finds one he likes. He cannot afford it however, says his business manager, so he asks to move back in with Khloe and Lamar. They get into a fight (him and Khloe) because he is rude. She talks to his business manager and decides on a plan for him to pay rent, but that money goes into savings for a house.

Bruce goes to golf and runs into Angie Everhart (supermodel). They decide to start playing golf together. Kris doesn't like this. She asks Bruce to pick up her dry cleaning and he forgets because he is with Angie. He calls her Ang and starts hanging out with her.

from ology.com

Kris and Kim decide to spy on Bruce and see him put his arm around Angie. What does she do instead of talking to her husband? She decides to see ex boyfriend Todd. What is wrong with her? While they are talking he whispers in her ear and asks how long he has with her. Does she not see why this is more wrong then playing golf with a friend? Bad move Kris, bad move.

Keeping up with the Kardashians: London

Kim is off to London to promote her fragrance. She invites Jonathan to come along but spends the whole time ignoring him. Kanye is also there on his tour and picks out outfits for her and spends time with her. Rob and Scott come as well. They spend time trying to figure out how to get Scott knighted. He becomes Lord of the manor, buys a fun fur coat and flaunts his new title all over town.

Meanwhile back at home, Bruce is always getting pushed around by Kris. Khloe and Kourtney don't like it so they make sure to not invite Kris to lunch. They also go to Boston together and we see another side of Bruce.

Keeping Up with the Kardashians: Part 2

We open with Kris and Kim going to an even called dress for success. While being interviewed she gets flour bombed. What I don't understand is why the assailant thought she would not be caught. Even a reporter grabbed her. Kim dusted off her shoulders and went back out, what a trooper! We soon learn she has been hanging out again with long time friend Kanye West. He even wrote a rap about her getting floured. He lets her borrow his car and she is all like we have so much in common "we like cars", um ok.

from wetpaint.com

Khloe is debating on whether or not to speak to her sisters. She does. Kim tries to fight again but she puts the kibosh on it. Lammy decides they should go and support Scott.

Scott is getting ready for the opening and him and Rob go out all night to party beforehand. Rob also gets a call that he missed the buying deadline for his lame sock venture and has to wait till next season. Bummer. Kourtney and the crew are in NY and they are giving her a hard time about Scott. If you don't like him why have another child with him? I really don't like Kourtney. Kim is wearing a KW earring and getting shit from her family about her relationship. She wants to keep this one private.

Finally its opening night at the restaurant. Kanye is there and tries to fit in with the family. Rob apologizes to Scott and Kourtney gives Scott a gift. All is well? Who knows. Did we soon forget about how rude Kanye was to Taylor Swift? Well as long as his name starts with K, we are good in the Kardashian hood.

Keeping Up with the Kardashians: Khloe's Back

Bruce wants to spend more time with his daughters, so he pretends her car is in the shop so he can drive them around. They realize that the car should be back by now and just confront Bruce. They hang out with him and he feels wanted after changing light bulbs.

Scott's restaurant is opening in New York and of course the WHOLE family has to go. Khloe is just back to LA and doesn't want to feel overwhelmed. She doesn't say yes to going. She has to keep Lammy out of the spotlight for a bit and that means no New York. Of course the sisters don't understand. Kind of makes you want to punch Kourtney since she has no right to say anything about anything after her DR ordeal.

from wetpaint.com

Scott has been asked to guest star at a child's party. Rob goes with him to keep him in check. He has a code word "red eagle" that he says if Scott gets out of line. Scott finally realizes he is having a daughter and needs to act more respectful.

In the end, the sisters are TOO much. They confront Khloe, call her an Odom and she agrees and storms out. To be continued....

Keeping Up with the Kardashians: DR part 2

We begin where we left off. Everyone left Kris and Bruce storms off. He goes to sleep in another room. When we awake, something is wrong with Kris' lip. She had a food allergy and her lip is so swollen she looks like Daffy Duck. She refuses to see anyone until the swelling goes down, so she gets a massage. Scott and Rob played drunken games on the girls and now Scott is hungover (after peeing in a trashcan). She wants to sleep the day away and selfish Kourtney doesn't understand his need for sleep.

We spend more time in DR, skeet shooting, sailing, being mean to Scott, making fun of Kris' swollen lip. Scott storms off to another hotel. Bruce goes to find him and they have a heart to heart. He realizes that Scott feels like an outside all of the time, because he is not permanently connected to Kourtney and could be deleted at any time. He finally agrees to come back. They give Kourtney a heart to heart as well and tell her to get Scott a symbol of their love.

They other girls make a music video and continue it on a boat. The whole family gets in and they all dance. Kim teaches them how to shake their buts in the water. Good role model. Although I have to say I like Kim so much more now that she is divorced.

from ology.com

In the end they have a family dinner. They say the peak and the pit of their day. We actually hate Kourtney. We find out that she promised Scott she would marry him if he gave her another child. Now she is turning back on her word. I feel bad for him. He should leave her, he really should. She gives him a love bracelet and it somehow appeases him for the moment.

Back to America....

Kardashians: Domincan Republic Part 1

Kris never met up with ex boyfriend Todd. They are deciding their family vacay and Kourtney says Ireland. She then decides not to go there and wants to do something else. Since everything was booked, she doesn't get a say in the new trip. They decide to go to Kim's choice the Domincan Republic. Before they go, Scott is upset with Bruce because he called him a friend and Bruce is upset with Scott because he walked out on nascar racing.

from wetpaint.com

They are about to go and Kourtney throws a fit. She doesn't want to go. They miss their flight and Kim charters a private plane. Surprise, Khloe is there too! Kendall and Kylies two girlfriends come along as well. We are all having a good time and finally Kourtney, Scott and Mason show up. She is so selfish and rude and indecisive.

Bruce tries to set Kim up with a local golf instructor. She is not interested. During dinner they have a talk about Kourtney and Scott's relationship and Kris digs into her about how their relationship is so back and forth. Finally Kourtney comes forward and calls her out on meeting up with her ex. Kris is caught and Bruce leaves, then everyone else does too. She is alone at the table, crying that she didn't lie.

To be continued.

Keeping Up with the Kardashians: Kris' other Man

Kris is back on the tennis court, grunting away. She sees a man who is Todd Waterman. Todd was the man she cheated on Rob Kardashian with. He was too young so they broke up for Bruce. She decides to say hello and he is smitten by her. They stop and talk and he hugs her but wont let go. She gives him her assistant's email. Bad move Kris. He emails the assistant and wants to see her and she is considering this. She doesn't tell Bruce and in the final scenes runs out to see him. Yikes!

Meanwhile, Scott is upset they never go out. Kourtney decides to let Kim go out with him instead. They have too much fun, going on chat roulette and partying and Kourtney is mad and tells Kim to get her own boyfriend.

Kendell and Kylie are eating pasta in the living room and make a stain on this very expensive rug. They try to get a powered cleaner and get it off which rips the carpet. They show Bruce and he says just to fess up. They do and Kris is not mad, why? Because she is busy doing the bad herself.

Keeping Up with the Kardshians: Family

This episode starts out with a tennis match. Kris and the girls are all playing together but she keeps grunting. The girls make fun of her so much that she gets upset. It is all fixable however, with a Chanel racket and balls. Bruce spends most of this episode with son we never heard about Brandon. Where is Brody? Brandon and his girlfriend are a singing duo. Bruce wants Kris to represent him, but she thinks its weird.

Bruce high jacks her meeting with partner Babyface. Shows him the demo and he agrees to see them. Brandon however, does not want to work with Kris and sees it as weird. They break the news to Bruiser and he pouts away.

Meanwhile. Kourtney and Scott are having their own issues. She is complaining he is not romantic enough. He gets spray tanned and fixes things pretending to do a scene from the Notebook. She doesn't fall for it, but instead, he puts roses, candles and dinner out for her. They kiss anyway after she is a royal biotch to him.

Bruce and Scott go out for a facial/shave together and Bruce explains how great little girls are until they are 12. Then they go off to college and are all better again. Something to look forward to Scotty boy.

Keeping Up with the Kardashians: Wigging Out

Kim is on a whole nother level here folks! She is in a blonde wig as a southern bell, a red wig as a Russian spy and a short brown wig as Kris Kardashian! She is trying to have fun as Khloe told her to do, since she is bummed about her divorce.

from wetpaint.com

Momager Kris has been running around town and with her new project of working with Babyface. She has no time for her family anymore. They decide to take her phone away and let her drink wine and hang out in sweats with her friends.

Rob is looking for a house and wants to take anyone with him but Bruce. He even says at the dinner table that he has no father figure to help. He was 3 when his dad died and has had Bruce in his life for years. It was really offensive and rude actually. Kris then tells him he needs to apologize and bratty Rob realizes the errors in his ways.

Keeping Up with the Kardashians - Momager

Kim seems to have a lot of time on her hands since her divorce. She is busy spending all of her time with Kylie and Kendal. They are working for 17 magazine now and need to scout models. Kendal is really shy, but Kylie makes her break out of her shell.

Meanwhile, Bruce has been putting spiders near Kim to get her to conquer her fear of them. It is not working. To get him back, she pretends to steal her own Ferrari. Hmmm, not going to make it on Punked Kimmy!

The big to do here is mom and Kourtney's relationship. Kourtney is still mad at her for having an affair when she was younger. After she sees her therapist she realizes that she needs to get over it and she will never do that to Mason or her new daughter to be. She is pretty rude to her though throughout the episode.

Keeping Up with Kardashians: Season Premiere

And we are back! Back to the series that started it all. Let's see how my favorite all K family is doing in Calabassas....

The family has been ignoring Bruce. So he picks up and goes to stay at Khloe's house. Kris doesn't event notice he is gone. Him and Scott hang out there and then he comes back. He takes the phones away from the youngest and they all go out for Yozen Frogurt together, cute name! We find out the girls are having problems keeping up in school because of their modeling careers. Bruce then voices to Kris that he will leave soon if this keeps up. Good for you Brucey!

Meanwhile, Kourtney is preggo again. She announces its going to be a girl. She has been trying to get a new dash space in LA and keeps Kim and Khloe out of it, because she always runs the business end. They are not happy so she tries to include them, but Kim has opinions on everything.

from wetpaint.com

Kris is so concerned with this DNA test to see that Khloe is the real daughter. She makes Rob, Kim and Kourt get a swab test and tries to convince Khloe but fails. She finally writes her a letter and Khloe loves it, but still wont do the test. She is convinced regardless.

Khloe & Lamar: Season Finale

Khloe gets a call that the tabloids think she is not her father's biological daughter. Her mother tells her to get a DNA test to shut everyone up. Khloe goes on a talk show where Lam Lam sends her flowers and tells her he misses her. Its very sweet. He then sends her a real life giraffe.

The season is over and they wont be renewing, but Keeping up with the Kardashians starts Sunday, so let's hope that is more interesting!

Khloe & Lamar: Malika is Jealous

Rob is now living with Khloe and Lamar. We find out he has a serious case of OCD. He checks the locks, cleans things, like 7 times, he counts, its pretty bad. Malika comes to visit and she is very jealous. I have to say that she is not wrong here. Its her one weekend in town and everywhere they go, Khlo invites new bestie Porschla. I would be a little mad too.

Not too much going on here, but rumor has it they wont renew for another season are you sad?