Kendall's Sweet Sixteen

Sweet 16's are supposed to be memorable, right? Especially if you are a Kardashian. So we open up with all three sisters telling us how their sweet 16s were. Simple, in a restaurant, but always with a cardboard cutout of them as little kids.

Kendall who is the second to last youngest is turning 16. She tells Kris momager that she wants something small and not over the top. Kris of course doesn't understand small and is planning a trip to the Bahamas. She only wants what she wants, which I guess most mothers are that way.

Kendall wants to get a tattoo that says "you are beautiful" in French across the back of her neck. Bruiser is not too happy about this. She tries to explain the significance of this, but he still is not buying it. She buys a plane ticket for her and little sis Kylie to go to Vegas, gets her mom to sign a consent form, and goes to get it. She chickens out once the stencil is on the back of her neck. Hubs and I were thinking, wont they know she used the car service and bought a plane ticket? Its not like she makes her own money, does she?

Meanwhile, she is also testing for her drivers license. She fails. And the instructor is less than lenient as she cries it out. Bruce, tells her to suck it up and try again in 2 weeks. Is 2 weeks really that long? Maybe in teen world. She finally takes the test again with a bit more lenient instructor and passes.

She gets Kris to choose the Andaz hotel in West Hollywood for her soiree. The party is great. Of course Bruce has 16 security guards and a metal detector. He also doesn't want anyone drinking or sneaking in alcohol. Kris has a few surprises up her sleeve too. She has fire dancers and some other shenanigans. A cute candy bar by Rock Sugar and a video montage made by little sis almost complete this perfect night. Big sis Khloe gets rap star Tynga (never heard of him) to preform at little sis' party. The crowd goes wild.

All in all an interesting event. I think the best part was that Kendall asked everyone to bring a gift, not for her, but for kids at the Los Angeles Children's hospital who needed them. I think she may be the least selfish Kardashian there is, don't you?

Mamma Drama

Let's check in with the girls....

Jenelle - She is living in her car sans Keiffer. She calls her mom, yet again and asks if she can come home. Barbara tells her that if she is really done with Keiffer she will need to press charges against him. She goes to the magistrate to do so and swears on a bible she is telling the truth (they can watch the clip) and presses charges. Another round of reconcile, fight, get kicked out in the future? Poor baby Jace.

Leah - she goes to get the MRI as they put Ali to sleep and put a breathing tube down her throat. Ugg. Her and Corey are both in tears. Its so sad to watch. We are all hoping that little Ali is ok. I don't know how Leah does it!

Kailyn - She tells her friends that she has 2 hours to move out of her mom's and into her new place. She takes all of her furniture including the TV. They pack it into their cars and move her into her new place. She made the small laundry room, Isaac's room. She calls her mom to say she moved and all her mom cares about is getting the TV back and the missing remote. Some mom.

Chelsea - She is about to get her surgery and she schedules it for a Wednesday when her dad is working and Adam is there to help. Bad move. Adam cannot handle baby Aubree nor can he handle Chelsea in pain. He is not doing a good job and we are not surprised. She calls dear old dad to complain and he basically gives her an I told you so.

Kris Throws a House Party

Three episodes in and I still have not seen Kris Humphries be such a monster. I digress. Let's see how this one panned out.

Scott is going through some religious crisis. He wants to embrace his Judaism. He tells Kourtney he is going to temple and try to reconnect. She thinks this is a faze just like race car driving or his beloved cane (remember the cane?). He goes back to temple with his shirt unbuttoned and then even throws a shabbat dinner. In the end Kourtney starts to support him. I think that Scott has come a long way. He is like a trained puppy.

Kim, Kourtney and Khloe need to go to LA to Sears for the opening of their line the Kardashian Collection. While they are away, Kris and Scott are staying back in New York. Kris of course wants to throw a party. He says he is inviting a few friends, but buys enough alcohol for 300 people. He has a keg, vodka and tons of other things. Girls are flooding the apartment. Scott comes home from a long day with the Torah and wants them all out. He tells Kris he has his back.

The girls get an email from a friend with pictures of strange girls in their hotel suite. They confront Scott and Kris and Scott takes the rap. He says "Hump a dump" is new and he wont be forgiven like Scott will be. Kris doesn't bother to clean up the party, but eats cereal instead, then finally calls housekeeping. He is so touched by Scott covering for him, that he confesses to Kim it was a few people that snowballed into a party. He promises not to do it again.

In other news, Jonathan (Kim's bestie and one-hit wonder PR TV show creator) is writing a tell-all book about Kim, or so she thinks. Kim asks him to dinner and instead of asking him what the book is about, she assumes and like the old saying makes an ass out of you and me! He actually is writing a PR book about how to be a Hollywood IT girl just like his kind, loving and caring bestie Kim Kardashian. She feels horrible after learning the truth and writes a touching forward that Kris emailed to Jonathan. What a sweet idea hump!

All is still right in the world of the Kardashians!

90's TV Stars Revamped

Ever wonder what happened to your favorite TV stars from the 90's? Get excited when they show up in a current show or movie of yours? I do! Here are a few recent 90's hunks and stars that have been showing up in my current TV roster. Whats 10 years in TV land, merely the blink of a channel.

Mark-Paul Gosselaar

We all loved him on Saved By The Bell (especially when he married Kelly). Recently, he has been staring as my favorite lawyer in Franklin & Bash. Still a great looking guy and lately he just showed up in ABC Family's "12 dates of Christmas" with Amy Smart, very cute film!

Joey Lawrence

We all loved him as Joey on Blossom (WOAH!). I thought he had dropped off the earth until he showed up on Melissa & Joey as Joe Longo with another 90's star Melissa Joan Hart, which always has me in stitches! What a hottie :)

Neil Patrick Harris

He all stole our hearts as medical prodigy in Doogie Howser, MD. He starred in Harold & Kumar go to white castle as himself and then we thought he dropped off the earth until he showed up as Barney Stinson in How I met your mother, where he currently resides and we currently love him!

all photos from imdb.com

Oh Rapunzel...

It seems to me that Grimm is taking these fables and only using the concept lightly, instead of literally as in Once Upon a Time does. This was the concept of Rapunzel, yet twisted. When I looked up the story I found that the husband of a pregnant woman was trying to get her what she craved out of a witch's garden. He got caught and in return for his life, he offered up his first born. The witch locked her in a tower where her hair grew and grew, and finally a prince came to save her. I guess a pot growing garden is the same thought here? Read on.

It starts off with two campers who get held hostage for accidentally walking onto the site of a marijuana growing field. As they are tied down, we see a very long braid and hear a snap of a neck. The campers break free. We find that this braid has strangled the drug dealer and left him for dead. In come Nick and Hank as they find pieces of this braid on the victim.

from nbc.com

Nick comes back in to investigate and sees this girl with the super long ponytail, but sees her morph into a bluebot. Being that he is besties with a bluebot, he goes straight to Monroe's house and interrupts him yet again. He asks him if he will go with him to find her and set her straight. They go into the forest and find her hideout up above a tree. She is sick however and starts to snarl. Monroe calms her down as he morphs into wolf face with red eyes. Nick realizes he has seen this girl before and thinks she is the long lost missing Holly. A child that went missing about 14 years ago. This was a case that Hank was personally on.

The pot growers brothers however are looking for who did this. They go and kidnap the camper thinking its him and torture and kill him. They also go into the forest to try and find the thing/girl that killed their brother. They end up dying, one by a shot from Nick and the other by the braided wolf. She is sick however and needs to be taken to a hospital. They finally take her to get her fixed up and Hank gets to tell her mother she has found her daughter. Such a touching moment.

They also decide to reinvestigate old subjects since the case has opened up again. There was camping equipment borrowed when they used to go to those woods from a neighbor. When they go to see him, he tells them he was bit by a dog (aka wolf aka Holly) in the forest. We actually discover that he kidnapped her, she didn't understand she was a bluebot, so she bit him and he ran away as she hid out in the forest because she was so scare all of those years. She does a lineup in the end and they arrest the neighbor.

All in all, a pretty good episode. Nothing mind blowing though. I am hoping to see more from this show, because I know they can go there. Very buff-esque, right?

The Christmas Gifts

The holidays are totally wonky on New Girl. Jess gets all the roomies roller skates as gifts. I love how they are all rollerskating across the apartment. There is a big discussion on how Nick always misses his flight on Christmas home to his Ma. She calls all of the boys and him throughout the episode to make sure he makes his flight. Foreshadowing, however, he doesn't.

Jess is trying to think of something to get Paul for Christmas. She goes shopping with Nick and the guys to try and figure it out. She initially wanted to give him a card for free freaky sex and Nick nixed it. She ended up giving him an anatomically correct 50 year old man's heart that beats and is quirky. He loves it of course. Although he gave her two tickets to Vienna and to see a symphony show there. She did give CeCe a fake moustache and Nick gave someone a pail of tacks. Horrible gift giving here. They then hug on the bed, Indian style as he tells her he loves her. Awkward. She says "Thank you", 10 times more awkward as only Jess can do.

from fox.com

They all decide to go to Schmidt's holiday party. Since he is the only guy in the office, he dresses as Santa every year. He is the sexy Santa as he lets all the girls sit on his lap in his shirtless, Jess' short shorts outfit with Santa hat. He is Jewish as he proclaims throughout the episode and says "Judaism SON!". He gave CeCe a perfume he made just for her with Seal salt (sounds like Cece) and sandalwood, because its so good! The perfume smelled like crap, but was a nice thought. Her current boyfriend was not so nice.

Even the little kid who wouldn't play with anyone asked if Santa was a Dbag. Haha. We totally laughed at this little kid. He would only play with Winston. The mother, my hubs pointed out, was the preggo one from the other episode. She in the end asks Winston if he wants to be babysitter or manny and she will pay him truckloads of money. The little white kid calls Winston "Lebron" and its hysterical.

Jess confides in Nick that she doesn't love Paul, but wont break up with him on a holiday. Next is New Years, then V-day and the Presidents day, so she has no time to do it. She says she will talk to him but ends up hiding in the bathroom with CeCe. Avoiding confrontation.

Nick however, goes to talk to Paul and says he knows Jess doesn't love him, which Paul does NOT know. Awkward more. He tries to play it off like a joke, but that doesn't work. Jess comes outside and walks into this and is embarrassed. The door locks and Nick is stuck outside on their talk with them. She basically tells Paul things need to be over and my heart is broken for Justin Long. I am not sure why she is not interested, but I am sure she loves Nick. This is more foreshadowing.

Back at the party, Schmidt takes a stand to his boss and tells her he wont be sexy Santa, or Sexy Easter bunny or cinco de sexy or Sexy MLK (I never get the voice down!) and she begins to respect him. He is super funny and I think cece starts to appreciate him a bit more.

On the way to the airport, Nick wants to cheer Jess up. They go to Candy Cane Lane where all the houses are lit for Christmas. Being 2 in the morning, the houses have gone to sleep. This is unacceptable. They all start screaming to turn on their lights and of course all the lights go on. It is magical, Jess is happy and Nick missed his flight yet again. Love them. I really do. Don't you?

Teen Mom - week 2

Excited to find out what has been going out with the girls since last week? Me too.

Jenelle - She has been living in her car for a few days with bum boyfriend Kieffer. I am appalled. Why would you live in your car for this guy? He's not sooo great! They go over to her friend Amber's to shower. She gets really upset because she thinks that Kieffer doesn't appreciate her because he doesn't want to sit at the library with her and wants to gamble instead. Shocker. Amber and her bf and Kieffer and Jenelle are off to Planet Fun (yet again) for a night of bowling. In the car, they are fighting because Kieffer brought a bottle of booze with him and she refuses to be around that. She gets mad he is drinking and they get into a fight out of the car. It gets physical and he throws her in the backseat and she gets out again and pounds on him, then walks away. This little girl is lost and needs some serious help, don't you think?

Leah - Ali is going to the eye doctor to get checked out. It seems the glasses are helping her with her vision, but her cornea is super small and there is nothing they can do about that, she was born that way. However, he wants to take an MRI of her brain. Apparently her condition can lead to blindness. She is scared, Corey is scared and I love how the other twin was crying because Ali was crying, so cute twin love!

Kailyn - Poor Kail. She gets a note from her mother's bf basically telling her that she does a whole laundry list of things wrong. She gets the suspicion that they are going to kick her out soon. She goes to see this non profit organization that helps teenagers find housing and pay for it until they get on their feet. She accepts their help and finds an apartment for her and Isaac to live so she doesn't feel scared she will get thrown out. Good exposure for the non profit!

Chelsea - She gets a fb message as she is studying for GED (how long does it take to study for this?) saying he wants to get back together. She stupidly is considering this. However, she trips on her stairs and tears her ACL and needs to go to the hospital. She realizes she needs surgery and stupidly asks Adam to be there. Her dad is in shock by this dumb decision and tells her, like everyone else does, that she is stupid. Well, stupid is as stupid does. Good luck Chels. Scenes for next episode clearly show Adam being a Dbag, again.

Felicity - In review

Since my TV shows are on hiatus, I thought I would delve in and dissect and congratulate one of my favorite shows out there. I own the four season boxed set of Felicity and have watched it from the beginning through the end over 10 times. Here are some of my favorite things from all the seasons, my favorite characters, and my insights. Enjoy!

Felicity (1998- 2002)

Background: Felicity is about a girl from Palo Alto, California who is the shy, smart, dorky girl. She is madly in love with the mysterious bad boy Ben (Scott Speedman).  She gets up enough nerve to ask him to write in her yearbook. He writes how he "watched her from a far, always wondering what she was thinking" and she then decides to change her college plans and follow him to New York. She is supposed to go to medical school to make her father happy, but deviates from the plan and goes to UNY - University of New York. Keri Russel plays Felicity Porter and she has this crazy, curly, messy hair. Its sort of her trademark. She gets to New York, realizes her and Ben really don't belong together and almost leaves. Until, Noel. Ahhh, Noel Crane. Where would we be without Noel? Scott Foley does an amazing job of making you love him and want to be around him. She also meets her future best friend Elena (Tangi Miller) and Julie (Amy Jo Johnson) and has a wacky, Gothic neighbor Megan (Amanda Foreman) who makes her freshman year miserable.

Seasons 1 - Her freshman year is like a whirlwind. She ends up falling for Noel after playing a game of boggle. Classic scene where they kiss and Megan walks in. Her and Ben begin to study together and end up getting held at gunpoint which brings them closer together. Ben is also dating Julie, after Felicity tells them this is OK. Felicity almost gets Ben kicked out for helping him with his paper. Elena's boyfriend is cheating on her with her friend from home. Felicity takes a side job at Dean & Deluca and works for her gay extraordinaire boss Javier (Ian Gomez). Thanksgiving comes around and we find out that Noel has a girlfriend from home, Hannah (Jennifer Garner and Foley's real life ex). Classic scene when Noel takes Felicity out to dinner to tell her about Hannah and she goes "Hannah" and cocks her head. Classic. Felicity and Noel make out in the bathroom during Thanksgiving as Hannah is at the table, Ben walks in and sees this. She starts to date Noel and it is great. Truly great. She tells him she wants to have sex with him, but ends up almost burning down the dorm "your pants are on fire!" Julie tries to find her biological mother. A guy from Felicity's past, Todd Mulcahay, comes to kiss her. He ends up in the hospital and also nudges Ben, his old buddy, to take a job at Dean & Deluca. Hannah comes back into town and Noel is unsure. He tells Felicity he wants to see where this is going. She ends up sleeping with really hot art student, Eli (Simon Rex). There is a wild game of dorm Assassins and another classic scene. Megan steals Felicity's jello and Elena puts a fake gun to her head and she says drop the jello! Noel finds out about Eli and decides he wants to move out and not be the RA anymore. Megan casts a spell which makes Ben break up with Julie and want to be with Felicity. They almost kiss in the back pantry of Dean & Deluca. Ben and Julie ask Noel and Felicity to come on a road trip with them cross country back to California. Noel finds out he cant go, because he got offered an internship in Berlin. Julie is raped by the pink guy (Devon Gumersall) and pulls away from Ben more. Julie and Ben break up, so now we are left with the choice. Should Felicity go with Ben or go with Noel. We ends the series, without knowing who she chose and her in a cab.

Season 2 - We find out that Felicity chose Ben. How could she not? Her and Ben are all lovey dovey and Noel and Julie hate her. Noel has moved in with Elena in an off-campus apartment. Ben is worried about commitment and love so he breaks it off with Felicity. Julie writes this horrific song about her "slut of Asbury Park" and they get stuck on a subway together. They hash things out. Megan and Felicity are sharing a room again and they are both co-RAs. She has advisees including the amazing Ruby (Amy Smart) who ends up falling in love with Noel and dating him. She gets offered an acting job and leaves for filming. Felicity chops off all of her hair. This is crucial. Ratings dropped really low when she did this.

She gets set up with a guy named David who she dates for a little while, but does not love. She adopts a stray dog and the dog gets in the way with David. They have to put Lucky to sleep eventually. Thanksgiving comes around and in true fashion, her and Noel kiss in his bedroom. Her new boyfriend's mother (and her art professor) walks in and catches them. She breaks up with David. Ruby comes back. Ben and Felicity break into the pool and drink beer and get caught. They are forced to do community service together and see a shrink, Dr. Pavone (Amy Aquino). They work in the medical clinic together with this guy Greg. Ben hates him and drops out. Felicity likes him and begins dating him. Ruby is pregnant and says its Noels. It is really a movie producers she cheated on Noel with. One of my favorite scenes is the painting party, they are all having a great time and dancing and I love it. She runs for student govt against Greg and there is libel and slander. Ben follows Felicity and Greg on their romantic trip away. She shuns him. There is a leak at the dorm so they are all staying at the loft. Julie lives there with Ben and Shawn (Greg Gruenberg). Megan takes the girls out dancing and to have drinks with her friends.

Ben shows up at the club to profess his love for her. Elena is dating her hot chem partner Tracy. Ben takes Felicity to a romantic roof top date to see the movie he bailed on her when they were dating. They kiss, its romantic, the music is amazing. Ben is going home and Felicity is going to stay in NYC to work an art internship. Her and Ben get a hotel together and lose track of time, causing her to miss her final. Ben does something really sweet and asks the teacher for some leeway. It ends with Javier's wedding. Noel ends up leaving with his cousin (Ali Landry) and Ben and Felicity have sex and he leaves. Megan and Sean get together and go away for the summer. Julie spends time with her birth mother.

Season 3 - Back to school. Felicity decides not to live with Julie, Elena and new girl Molly. Instead she wants a small studio apartment in Brooklyn with Ben. It has all sort of issues, bugs, lighting, neighbors who use their bathtubs. They however are going strong. There is a mission to find Noel, or Leon as he has been calling himself. He married Natalie and dropped out of school. Julie ends up leaving after we find out that she could have donated her organs to her biological dad who was dying but didn't. They find drugs in the new apartment, they are really Molly's and her boyfriend James. Noel breaks it off with Natalie and gets an inheritance. Felicity does too many shots at a frat party and ends up half naked in some guys bed on a website. Ben finds out and gets beat up by the frat brothers. Noel even gets to hook up with Tyra Banks! Elena has an affair with cute neighbor across the hall. Tracy finds this out after Elena thought he knew about her affair with a teacher Freshman year. He goes on some mission to help people, Christianity and all. Mid season ends with James crashing their Christmas party and trying to shoot Molly. He ends up shooting a girl named Avery (Kristin Lehman). He saves her life. Back in January, Avery is obsessed with Ben and tries to buy his affection. They even kiss. He goes with her to the Hamptons and Felicity is stuck chasing after him, again. Noel is falling for Felicity again and tries to win her over with a breakup kit. Her mom thinks they are perfect for each other. Elena burns her corneas and dates a heavy guy. Tracy comes back from Africa dating Rose. Elena thinks they are having sex and gets upset. Noel is graduating. He gets a job offer in Seattle and him and Felicity toilet paper the library. He realizes they cannot be a couple and does not want to be around her. Season ends with Ben joining an EMT program and Felicity staying in NY. We find out that Noel's job falls through and he has to stay in NY with just Felicity "want to get some ice-cream?" and Tracy proposes to Elena, she drops to the floor in shock!

Season 4 - Ahh Senior year. All of the great things happen this season. We know that we are saying goodbye to the crew, but we are still saddened and not ready for the end. Noel has spent the entire summer with Felicity and Javier, tanning on top of tar beach (their roof) while Ben has been away. He gets back and wants to be pre-med. He is having a hard time and ends up getting kicked out of class but then let back in and acing all of his finals. Elena and Tracy don't go through with their wedding. In place of them, Sean and Megan get married. They start unsuccessful businesses including Shemegan shirts. Felicity ends up sleeping with Noel on the roof. Nobody knows, except the huge hickey she has. Avery starts sleeping with Noel just to get back at Ben. Ben and Noel are living together and they get into a huge fight and Noel says "I already had her". "I'm not talking about a freshman year crush" "neither am i" score for Noel!  Noel is offered a guidance counselor position and offers the art TA position to Felicity. There is a fire and Noel saves Felicity and they bond over this. Ben also feels like he lost her and there is a touching scene where they sleep together and we think all is alright, until the morning when he leaves and says he cant do this. Another Thanksgiving and this time Ben brings his father's AA friend. He ends up sleeping with her and getting her pregnant. Noel gets a job at a graphics firm where he meets Zoe Webb. He falls in love with her. They are going to get married. He quits the firm and opens his own business with Sean. They are doing well together. Felicity copies her art history final, she is so stressed with this baby thing. She gets caught but somehow doesn't get kicked out. Lauren leaves for Arizona with the baby. Ben proposes to Felicity. Her parents ask her when is she going to stop following Ben. The season ends with Felicity going to med school in California and Ben is right there. He finally follows her

The twist - The season doesn't end. They decide that Ben does follow her to Cali, but cheats on her. He follows her but ends up cheating on her. She comes back to NY for Noel's wedding with Zoe (Sarah Jane Morris). Elena dies in a car crash. Megan does another spell. This one sends her back in time to the day she slept with Noel. Now she is stuck back in time and she is the only one who knows she came from the future. This time around she does it different. She picks Noel over Ben and that ends badly. He ends up choosing Hannah, yet again. She goes back to pre-med and falls in love with Ben again. This time he doesn't sleep with Lauren or get her pregnant. However, this time around Noel dies in the fire. She tries to find the guy who wrote the spell book and get back to the future. She also warns Elena (which I saw in the deleted scenes!). They do a whole reminiscing scene and we end up back at the future. She is smiling with Ben and everyone is there at Noel's wedding. AMAZING.

Thoughts - Felicity reminds me of a simpler time. It makes me think of going away to college for the first time and falling in love. How difficult things may seem, when they really aren't. I love this show and the characters. I am still obsessed with the Ben vs. Noel issue. I think that she gained great friends, great insight and found herself, finally.

The Pop Up Sale

This episode was mediocre at best. I did laugh a few times and there were a few funny quotes, but really girls, lets step it up. We dont want to lose your new show momentum!

We start at the diner, reading the comment cards that customers have been leaving. The brunette waitress is rude (holler) and the blonde they want to get with, the cashier I thought he was a DJ and the chef needs to wear a non cutoff shirt because he smells. Oleg's character is tired and old and he gets into a verbal match with baby Han.

The girls are trying to throw a lit match into the oven from far away (to keep their eyebrows, Max had to draw hers on for a whole year in high school) because their oven is broken. They decide they are going to buy a new oven by selling some of Caroline's real rings she keeps hidden in a popcorn kernel jar. They are called TAT rings, from some designer with those initials that I have never heard of. Max shows her a picture of a purple oven that she has always been dreaming of "kitchen porn" that she cannot afford.

They decide to go to a cash for gold shop. As they are waiting they are wondering why the woman does not have dollar signs in her eyes, haha. I love how they reference real life TV shows and commercials, things that I can understand! She tells her that she will give her $250 for her $2500 ring and Caroline starts to get mad, but she calls the goons in from the back to handle things and they leave. Although Max says she was feeling one of them, haha.

from cbs.com

Caroline decides to go to a fancy department store (Bendels, Bergdorfs, Saks?) to return the ring and say it was a gift. They get there and tell the lady it was from an ex who beat her and they don't have the receipt. She is willing to help them. Caroline sees tons of people she knows. One girl who is super jealous of her TAT rings and then a guy who apparently she got fired for smoking cigarettes. He was so upset he lost his job, his but got too large and his boyfriend dumped him, but now he is on the road to recovery and the store manager, of course. He tells her no receipt, no deal and he knows these rings are 3 years old. She is busted.

They get into the elevator and announce to a bunch of trashy looking Jersey Shore, but rich Arabic women, that there will be a pop-up sale in the girl's bathroom. There is a girl in there taking a dump and Caroline says "who shops and plops", hysterical. They are getting the rings ready and two girls from Caroline's past walk in and here the word pop-up sale, thinks its gross and take her out to lunch. She leaves Max in the dust, makes her look stupid and walks away. Max does not sell the rings.

Caroline goes back to the diner and Max is not speaking to her. She is mad she left her and feels like they don't have a future together. She tells her she left her with her new friend "blueballs" which was the name of one of the Arabic women, haha. When they get home from work, the purple oven is there. Caroline sold ALL of her TAT rings to neighborhood pawn shops to buy her the oven of her dreams.

"You want to hug me don't you", yes. And they do. And I am happy. The total is the same, they are still broke. I need something big to happen, don't you?

Let's get pregnant...

I love how Kim has been married for all of 2 minutes and she is already thinking about getting pregnant. It just shows how immature she is. Let's rewind.

She decides her and Kris are ready to have a baby after her puts her in Mason's crib. OK. Weird. She tells her sister and then her mom she wants to stop taking her birth control pills, because its a sign she ran out (um that happens every month Kim) and she wants to have a baby. Also, once you are off your pill it doesn't happen like magic. She needs to wait a few months. Shows how prepared she is.

from eonline.com

She goes to tell Kris and they start discussing where to raise a family. He says Minnesota (because he always says Minnesota) and she says no way and they fight, shocker. He tells her that once she is old and has kids, nobody will even know her. Burn.

Kourtney finds lesbian porn on Scott's computer and is appalled. They decide to go out on the town and she starts getting flirty and drinky with other chicks. He is not amused or excited and they go home and actually sit in the same bed together. Wow.

Kris Jenner comes into town because she is going to host the Today Show. Scott gets offered up to go with her because Kourt and Macey want to sleep in late. And where is Kim? "She is with the dogs, her husband barks" says Kourt and Scott. "What does uncle Kris do, Mason?" and he ruffs. CUTE. I heart him. He goes with her, they have a great time and have lunch together afterwards.

Kim decides she actually is NOT ready but also decides she is not telling Kris. Wow. The lies and betrayal keep pouring in. I am not sure what E is trying to do, but they are making Kim look REALLY bad. After this, I like Kris Humphries a little bit more.

Who are you siding with?

The Huntsman's Heart

This episode had me glued to the TV set. It all starts with Sheriff Graham who is in love with Emma. He kisses her and starts to get flashbacks of his old fairy tale life. He sees flashes of wolves with red eyes and a forest.

He then gets drunk, tries to make sense of things and goes to Regina's. He kisses her and then has a dream about his old life. There are flashbacks of his life in Fairy Tale world. We learn that he was raised by wolves and is known as the huntsman. He kills animals and then cries. He is hired by the Queen to kill Snow White. Here is where I am confused. Why does the Queen want her dead? We learn that Snow's dad, the Queen's hubby dies. The Queen is the one responsible for his death. She then wants to kill Snow. She hires the huntsman to do so.

from abc.com

He takes her into the forest and she knows what is coming. She writes a letter to the Queen forgiving her for her death. The huntsman reads it and decides to let Snow go. He kills a deer and gives the queen the heart of the deer in place of Snow's heart. She realizes it is not a human heart and takes his instead. She keeps his heart locked up in a vault with all the other human heart's she has collected. I can only assume her father's heart is there as well. She tells him he belongs to her and she has his heart and when she squeezes he will feel it. Scary, I know and creepy!

Back in Storybrooke, Sheriff Graham is remembering all sorts of things. He goes over to see Mary Margaret and says she looks familiar and he knows her. That he doesn't remember when/how he met anyone. He then starts to see his old friend the wolf with the one red eye and follows him around town. He follows him to the forest where he sees Mr. Gold doing some "gardening". Strange encounter if I say so. He even goes to see Henry so that he can fill him in on how his story goes. They decide he is the huntsman and he saved snow, which is why he has a bond with Emma. Henry tells Graham that Emma is Snow's daughter.

He then sees the wolf and so does Emma. They follow the wolf back into the forest to a mausoleum with an icon he saw in his dream. He says he needs to find his heart there. She breaks in with him and they find a coffin and then a bunch of other random things, but no heart. They look at everything except in the coffin. Regina comes by and catches them together (after she warned Emma to stay away from Graham) and says this is where her father is buried. The name on the coffin says Henry Mills, her father, whom she ripped his heart out in Fairy Tale world. She goes into a tiff with Emma saying she has taken everything away from her. Emma retorts with they came to her, Henry and Graham. Regina punches Emma in the face, Emma punches Regina and Graham pulls them off of each other. He breaks it off with Regina and they go back to the station.

Regina goes into the mausoleum to place flowers on her father's grave, then she lifts the coffin. There is a secret passage and a staircase. She climbs down the stairs and into the place we saw in Fairy Tale Land. She opens the chambers with the hearts and holds Graham's in her hand. At this point, my mouth is open, I am saying NO WAY and we all realize Regina KNOWS she is the queen.

Back at the station, Emma and Graham get cozy again. They kiss as he realizes that he is from another time. He unlocks the mystery. Boy, her lips are good! As he starts to tell Emma what he knows, Regina starts to squeeze his heart. This time, she squeezes till the heart is dust. At the same time, we see Graham drop to the floor and have a heart attack and die. Emma is in tears and Regina smiles.

Oh.My.G-d. Best episode yet!

So Regina knows she is the queen but is playing this all aloof? Or did she get flashbacks to and has started to realize? But, she doesn't know who Emma is. Maybe because that page has been ripped out. And, why not try to kill Snow in real life if she hates her so much? wow. I cannot wait till the next one!

Grimm - Double Dose

After not having Grimm on for a while, I was blessed with a double dose. Let's start with the first and end with the next.

I smell a rat....

This is the story of the pied piper who led all the rats into town by playing music. Of course a modern Grimm twist on the story. This high school boy who plays the violin and wears a bunny mask to disguise himself as this cool underground DJ, harvests rats and loves them. They follow him and do his bidding when he plays music for them. There are so mean kids at school that however don't want him to be the lead in the musical. They try to frame him by using his rats to kill the music teacher. The death scene was gruesome. He was eaten alive by these rats, ew.

from nbc.com

The toxicologist found fibers of a BMW in the rats body, leading it back to the rich boys who framed rat boy. The dad is a rat which Grimm saw. Apparently, all these evil creatures know hes a Grimm, but he cannot see their true form until they are upset. We find out that rat boy is really the DJ with the big pink cat head. They set up the rich boy to touch the phone to answer the text to go meet the infamous cat DJ.

Roddy, the rat boy, is so upset about the frame job that he leads the rats to kill the group of kids who framed him, including the girl of his dreams. I guess that's over. Grimm of course catches them before the rats can consume anyone else.

There is another scene where the plumber is really a beaver thing and realizes Nick is a Grimm. This is the first time his girlfriend notices that someone thinks he is a bit off. And another scene where is partner goes to have dinner with Adaline, from the Queen Bee episode. What is her deal? She is obviously trying to kill all Grimms.

I want to know who the police chief is. Is he bad? Is he good? From what I have read his name means "the fox", so is he the fox from all the fairy tales? And if so, that's evil right? But why doesn't he help Nick and Hank so much? Strange.

I'll blow your house down....

Excited to say the next episode was just around the corner. This is the story of the three little pigs and the wolf who blew their house down. Funny enough, it starts with one of the wolves who is using the shake weight. Hilarious concept. He shakes so hard, while smoking a cigarette, that his weight flies out the window. He goes to retrieve it and his house blows up. We find out that he calls in Monroe, his best buddy wolf, to come get him.

from nbc.com

We find out that his brother's house was also blown up. We also find out he has a sister who is also Monroe's ex. She is also however, from Drop Dead Diva, she plays Grayson's fiance who left him at the altar, Vanessa. Love the crossover here. She is not too keen on the Grimm thing. She also leads Monroe out into the forest to hunt like they used to. They fall asleep as the killer comes to the door and shoots the shake weight wolf. He is dead. They are sad.

We find out the killer is really a pig. He does however make some comment about how his kind and the Grimms are not enemies. Angelina, the sister, Monroe's ex, goes back to her house, smells pig. We find out that the pig in question is really a cop on the same force as Nick. He tells him that he knows it was him. Pig goes into a whole line of history how they are getting the wolves back for what they did to them. The pig tells Monroe that now everything is even, now that her brothers are dead.

Creepy again, Orson the cop pig, emerged from a bath tub of mud, and in came Angelina. Nick had read that if you hit a wolf in the lower back they are hurt. He kicked Angelina there, but too late, Orson fired. He is a cop you know. She ran away. He was arrested and she was never to be seen again.

I wonder what will become of her and Monroe. I love how they delved deeper into his background and we now know why he is all alone. Boo.

Who are you loyal to?

We start off with training in the dojo with Ems and Takeda. She is really doing well and telling him that she is nervous about her two targets standing in the way. Tyler is one and fakemanda is the other. She claims that Tyler will be easy to get rid of, but fakemanda is like a ticking time bomb. He says you better stay clear from the blast and use your mortal enemy to take her down - Victoria.

from abc.com

Back at Grayson manner, Victoria gets served with divorce papers. Ashley is all chipper because she thinks they are going to their besties lunch when Victoria snaps at her. She soon realizes Ash may be an asset to her and retracts claws. Victoria goes off to have lunch (awaiting Daniel) and gets approached by a man whom she outbid on a Kadinsky. He tells her that Conrad had asked him to represent him in the divorce, but he refused and he wants to represent Victoria instead. She takes his card, smiles and says she will think about it.

Back in Montauk, Sammy the dog is not too found of fakemanda. He is growling at her and someone Jack admits he is a bit senile. She says she blocked out her childhood and holds no memories, he bites, hook, line and sinker. In walks Ems and Sammy is all about her. Jack notices this and notices how much she loves him. We flashback to when she had to give Sammy away to Jack and how she said she would come back for them. Well she sort of did? She gives Jack a note to give to fakemanda suggesting to come over to the house to jog her memory.

She comes over and Ems decides to use her to win this battle. She gives fakemanda her diaries so she can read up and in walks Daniel. He hears the name Amanda Clarke and now the ball is rolling in his head. To me this is perfect for Ems. She has someone to pretend to be Amanda, and we all know that once Victoria finds out she will have her head. Off with her head! She pretends she has no idea who David Clarke is. Good one Ems.

Tyler is cooking up a scam at the pool house. He invites Ashley to a fancy dinner. We see he is a pill popping junkie. They close in on the bottle and I can see its some drug used for schitzos. He seems to be running low and also getting anxious. He takes his bonus money and pays back Nolan. He tells him they should run away together for a weekend. Nolan suggest Monte Carlo. He is starting to like dear old Ty and I think Ty likes the lush lifestyle that Nolan brings.

Daniel, Takedo and Ems are out to dinner to get his business. She is the translator, yet everything she says to Takedo has nothing to do with business. He is telling her that she loves Daniel and that will get in the way. She protests. She tells him to invest with Daniel so she can get close to the Grayson files. She says he can use her money. Takedo says his time with her is up and he is leaving. He can help no more. She tells Daniel as he sits there all stupid, he is willing to invest 50mil. They rejoice. Ems decides to tell Daniel that Nolan was blackmailed by Tyler into investing. She puts another seed in his head. Oh, how the love lost will believe anything!

Back at the Inn where Grayson Global is now residing, Conrad congratulates his son on the deal and Tyler is mad. After Ty storms out, Daniel tells Dad that he is blackmailing him. Tyler comes back in and Conrad tells him that he is fired. Tyler pulls out the blackmail card and tells him he knows the truth about David Clarke being a patsy and the flight and everything. Conrad now realizes he is in the water with a bigger shark than he had thought.

Tyler rushes over to Nolans and demands the sex tape. He shows it to him, their tryst is dunzo and Tyler takes the tape. Nolan, is heartbroken and calls Ems and tells her that he is done with her. She tells him that he chose a hooker over her and he tells her he is no longer involved. She seems aloof and says peace out to that alliance. Will that hurt her later? Only time will tell.

Victoria meets with the fancy lawyer and decides to take his services. He has a few conditions. She must not talk to Grayson, done. She must be prepared to get bloody, done. And finally, she must disclose all assets, cars, houses, accounts and jewelry. I wonder if he paused on the jewelery because of the fancy watch she gave David Clarke? She agrees to all terms.

There is some side note about Declan and Charlotte. He wants to get an apartment with her, but big brother Jack tells him to finish high school then college so he can provide for Charlotte. He listens, gives the check back to her. Charlotte gives the check back to her mother and says that Declan and her are still together and she loves him. Then she says she is moving out and in with her father. We later see her show up at Daddy's door and he takes her in. Victoria sheds a single tear.

In another side note, fakemanda decides to bring Jack some sea glass, which is something she read from the diary. He is all happy about it and shows her a whole jar he was hiding the whole time, waiting for her to return. His love is so pure, but for the wrong girl my friend.

Daniel decides to go back home to protect dear old mom. She walks by hearing him on the phone talking about Amanda Clarke and how creepy she is. Victoria hears all and her heart literally skips a beat when she thinks Amanda Clarke is back. Another seed, another revenge.

Tyler kept little whale cam and has not only the sex tape, but the tape of Lydia exposing the Graysons. He has a whole lot of stuff in his blackmail bag of tricks.

Final scene, we do a flashback to the lawyer guy and little Amanda. He apparently denied the appeal against her father so that he would never see the light of day. She threatened him way back when and for some reason now he wants nothing to do with Conrad. Something in that puzzle does NOT add up. But, since he was not so nice to daddy dearest, Ems is going to take him down eventually, right?

I cannot wait till the next episode. Tyler has a gun and everyone is there. oooo.. can you wait?

And the winner is....

We will get to that soon.

We are down to the final three, big-eyed Allison, ghetto Angelea and wild child Lisa. They are set to do their Cover Girl commercial and photo shoot. Allison is having problems with her big beautiful eyes, because they are very light sensitive. She however looks stunning even with eyes closed. Angelea gives some ghetto-ness when she is doing her commerical but Mr. J loves her regardless.

They get their gowns that they had previously designed and they are all stunning. Lisa's is glam rock with shingles on the front, Angeleas has gold pieces and a high neck and Allison's is lacy and gorgeous. They are set to do their final runway.

They have to swim through water in these wigs with black eye makeup. Angelea is crying because she doesn't know how to swim, Lisa tries to do some mermaid moves and gets her hair caught in her face and Allison is a graceful swan. They get up out of the water into a tent where they run out and another model does the walk. They run backstage, change into their gown, get dried off, attach to their harness and reappear into the tent. They do their walks, but are allowed to do it freestyle and dance to their songs which play in the background. I think Lisa's is such a catchy tune.

We are off to judging and we hear from panel that Angela has been disqualified. They do not say why, just that disqualifying information was found out and they wont even use her footage or anything else to be fair to the two other girls. I am still like WHAT happened? Did her mouth get in the way, did she cheat, was she arrested? WHAT?!

**So I read a few articles and found out that Angelea did WIN. But, she bragged about it on her facebook page before the episode really ran, so they disqualified her. They had to re shoot the finale judging scene. WOW. She really did 718 herself this time!**

They judge from the commercial to the runway, to the photos and give Allison a hard time. I can see where this is going. They are too afraid her baby blues are light sensitive. They show part II of Tookie's video and whomever is in the last shot is the winner.

from cwtv.com

LISA! Of course. If you read back through my posts, you see that I thought Lisa would take this one home. And she did. Congrats LISA! You are a Top Model ALLstar.

Teen Mom 2 is BACK!

The girls are back and I couldn't be any happier. Something to fill this whole Christmas no TV thing! We are right in the middle of Halloween for the girls and the babies. Let's see what has been going on with the girls since we last left them.

Leah: Last season Leah and Corey got married. They still haven't found out what was wrong with Ali. In this episode she says she is tired of being a full time mom and wants to get a job. She ends up getting a job as a dental assistant full time. Corey is concerned she will flirt with boys. What? Who would ever want to leave a redneck like Corey? They dress the girls up for Halloween and have a date and all is good with the Sims family.

Jenelle: When we last left her she had bailed badboy Kiefer out of jail without her mother knowing. When will she learn? He is bad news bears. She is living with her mom, going to school, getting her life together and babysitting her own baby. But she is keeping her man a secret. Things are going well with mom and she has plans to babysit Jace the next day, but she must be home by 12:00. She goes out with Kiefer and apparently doesn't get home in time. Barbara tells her she cant babysit and she freaks out. Kiefer comes over to soothe her and she complains yet again that nobody loves her. She stupidly, lets Kiefer borrow her car as he drops her off in front of her house with Barbara watching out the window. She tells Jenelle, its time for her to go. She takes her fresh laundry and throws it outside. She takes Jace from her and kicks her out. They get into a huge yelling match and curse words are thrown and Jenelle is really scary. She sits on her driveway with clothes in hand, waiting for Kiefer to pick her up. I am scared for this girl. She needs help.

Kailyn: Last time we saw her, she was with new boyfriend Jordan, living at her mom's house and being explosive with Jon, Isaac's daddy. Here we find her working things out civilly with Joe and having joint custody. They even seem nice to each other. Maybe a little separation did them well. She is still with boyfriend Jordan. They take little Isaac out trick or treating. He gets the best costume of the episode award for a giraffe as she is a cowgirl and Jordan is a baby, very cute. She is a bit worried what Joe will think if he knew that Jordan was spending so much time with his baby boy. But we will see! Coming scenes show that living condition are starting to unravel for Kail.

Chelsea: When we last left her, her and Adam were dunzo. He admitted to cheating on her, moved out and she was left with nobody but cute baby Aubree and her daddy dearest. Here we see her still trying to study for her GED. Which, hello, you are not getting much done with baby in tow. Drop Bree off at Dad's and study girl! Adam is writing her asking to see his daughter and she starts to get feelings again. I always feel bad when people jump back into bad relationships, because somebody misses them. We as girls, have ALL been there. Even her mom is like WHAT don't you dare! Adam comes over to see his daughter and wants a family kiss and hug. She is always hoping to reunite her family and of course is back to swooning over Adam. Its only a matter of time before they get back together and break up again. Poor Chels.

Are you excited the girls are back? You know I am!

Christmas in Suburbia

Tessa is giving George the ice treatment for cheating on her with NYC. He then breaks up with Zoe via skype and blames it on Tessa. I had this feeling all along that he really didn't like her and used Tessa as an excuse. She feels really bad because he plays it up that he is sad by saying he wont even eat tuna because it reminds him of Zoe.

George takes a wreath making class with LLOYD. (He will always be Lloyd from Entourage to me) because he is interested in the non-complicated art teacher Amy. He asks her over to trim the tree and then tries not to make it obvious by saying everyone is coming.

Over at the Royce house, Dallas is so excited to get a gift from George. They are a pair of red mittens which she tells herself are significant because of some story she told him about red mittens when she was a kid. Little does she know, or we find out later that he gave them to all his party guests. I still got to see Dahlia yelling at Yicoult the dog to stay out of her room, bahaha. I love it!

Tessa asks Lisa what to get dad to make up for his heartache. Lisa tells her that they make gifts for each other and she hates it, because she really wants clothes. Tessa decides to skype Zoe and give her dad the gift of love for Christmas by inviting her to the party to be with George.

They throw a huge party over at their house just so he can spend time with Amy. Little does he know Zoe is at the door. Lisa is outside standing watch (not wearing a coat to protest mom, because its across the street) and Zoe comes in like a hurricane, looking great in a sparkly dress (I am totally into sparkly dresses lately). George makes Noah break up with Zoe. He says he always dates the crazy girls. Noah begins to do so and Zoe ends up thinking that Noah is into her and gets mad when he tells he is married.

from wordpress.com

Dallas shows up because her flight is cancelled and to thank George for the mittens. She then kisses him, long and hard. My heart swells. I am so excited!! Amy witnesses him kiss Zoe and then Dallas and then flips out on him and is not as uncomplicated as he once thought.

This show just gets better... doesn't it?

Oh Holly Night

I have to say, even though I am sad this was the mid season finale, I was in love with every minute. Finally, 90210 is back to one of my favorite shows. It was in critical condition there for a while, but welcome back! Let's dig in...

Naomi is getting ready for her new internship. She gets there and realizes all she is doing is making copies and lattes. She realizes she has no idea how to do any of this, so she buys a whole office and practices making copies in her house. Oh Naomi. Her boss, who is Holly's mother, tells her she is ready to host a party with her and she is beyond excited. Her and Holls are besties now and she and Austin are even invited to her birthday party, score. Naomi is truly sincere with a big heart and I cannot believe she always gets such a bad rap. She goes to the party and tells Austin he is to keep Holly busy (foreshadow much?) and she ignores him and tries to pretend she is not working the party when she realizes this is Holly's mother and she took the internship from her. Holly finds out, flips out and tells her that life at CU is over, yet again. Naomi does a bang up job at the party, slips on something sexy and surprises Austin. Of course, he is half naked and making out with Holly. He doesn't even stop to run after her. Burn. I really did like them together.

Dixon wants to play his new song that Aid had sang and he remixed. She tells him its all personal. Its about her daughter she gave away who is now 3 years old. He writes another song instead to show her he cares more about her than his music. She is happy, they kiss and she tells him they can now write music together and collaborate.

Navid is still trying to set up his uncle so he wears a wire and goes to a deal with him. He is so nervous that the guys know something is up. The deal is off and Navid stays there to watch the merchandise. The guys come back later, rip off his mic and then continue to pulverize him. He ends up in the hospital looking like a million bee stings with a swollen face. The cop girl is there professing her love for Navid as Silver watches through the glass. She leaves, of course, the moment he tells cop girl he is in love with Silver.

Meanwhile. Silver finds out her new professor hottie (is this not against school rules?) has a wife, well separated one and a daughter. She says that is a lot to take in. After seeing Navid moving on she goes to tell him she is ready to be with him.

Annie. Dear Annie. She goes to Jeremy's house to try and get her necklace and is so upset. Liam comes over to comfort her and they end up making out and doing it. SCORE. All of us Annie/Liam fans' hearts are swelling. She goes off to steal the necklace instead. She traps herself in Jeremy's bedroom with said stolen necklace and uses her smart phone to tape him saying not nice things about grandma Marla, score. She walks out with necklace in hand and inheritance to soon follow.

Liam however, goes to a party with Vinny (Jersey Shore January 5th y'all) and sees that he hires escorts or Bree, Annie's friend. She tells him that Annie is an escort too and that's how she met Patrick. Liam to the rescue! He goes to Patrick's hotel room (does he have a gps on the guy?) and punches him in the face, old man goes down! Then he goes to find Annie on his motorcycle. Of course, a car comes out of nowhere and hits Liam. He is down. We are all mortified. He looks gorgeous. The girl who hits him is Lexi from Vampire Diaries and she sees the poster of him and knows she hit a model.

from cwtv.com

Of course, we have to wait until January to see if he survives, but I am assuming he will.

Did this episode raise your hopes again about 90210?

Bad In Bed

We've all been there. The extremely awkward first time. Well, when you put Jess and Paul in bed together you get a whole lot of awkward!

She decides she wants to have sex with him. She realizes she has no idea what she is doing in bed, since she was only in one relationship for 6 years with the same guy. She has four moves, all of which are weird. She asks the guys for advice and stumbles onto Schmidt's laptop which has tons of weird porn. She watches for about 5 hours and then talks to the roomies. Schmidt tells her to lightly choke him. Nick doesn't really chime in and we see why. Winston says he is the best at sex. They go into a funny story about Nick's first time where he didn't get his pants down all the way. "I'm going to tap him like a maple tree" she says. They then go into how Nick and old girlfriend Caroline used to sound, like a rescue miner "are you OK, yeah are you?" omg. I die.

A small interlude of Nick not wanting to get a haircut. He thinks that getting a haircut is like being trapped. They talk to you and you have to sit in the chair. He is right, in some way. He ends up at Winston's barber that give him a fade and some weird line going up the side of his head. Sort of like Vanilla Ice. We also see some youtube video of guy getting hair cut as blood spurts out of his head, ew.

Jess goes lingerie shopping with CeCe and ends up buying some weird piece that looks like rope intertwined with a starfish in the middle of her belly. She is not allowed to try it on, so she just buys it. She tries to get herself into the contraption, fails and then finally succeeds. Her and Paul try to do the nasty. She begins by doing role playing or her version of it. She does strange English voices and old lady voices and so does Paul. She rips off her clothes, revealing said star and begins to choke Paul. He gets freaked out and runs out.

from fox.com

Schmidt has this whole other thing at his all girls office. He is in rivalry with coworker (Susan Sarandon's daughter Eva Amurri - Banger sisters?) and he gets himself invited to his boss' baby shower chock full of women. He goes for the party animal approach to get them to like him, drinks shots, even downs a bottle of pedilyte and throws said preggo boss into the pool. They have a blast and he shows up his coworker and even brings a girl home who does the walk of shame the next day.

He comes back to the next day to apologize for leaving but to admitting that she is so much more experienced then he is. They get it on in the elevator as only a hot sex scene would continue. The guys get in the elevator post-sex and notice Jess is missing her shoe. Does missing shoe = sex?

The Real Horsewives

I wish I laughed more this episode. I was looking forward to a good laugh, but found myself in mediocrity.

In the diner, Max and Han have a cute little convo about the difference between homeless and hipsters. They hear from Oleg (who is wearing two women's fur coats and snaps a photo of his junk on said hipsters camera that they left) that it is going to snow. Caroline goes into a memory about how beautiful snow is. Max tells her that's rich people snow and she has not seen it broke style yet.

They go home to realize that Chestnut cannot stay with them in the snow. Even the tarp that Caroline built is not going to cut it. She gives Chestnut her winter coat and cuts up her cashmere leggings for him, but still not enough. They decide to try a few options. There is a stable in Brooklyn that keeps horses so that they can be in ads. They bring Chestnut over and the guy says that he is out of shape. Immediately, Max and Caroline go on the defensive and say "look at your gut" and you are out of shape, etc. He tells them its a no go, and sends them on their way.

from brokelyn.com

Back over in Manhattan at Peach's house, she tells Max she got asked to interview for real housewives of Tribecca. She tells her that her former bestie has a blind cat and is trying to one up her. So Max suggest that she take in her deranged horse. She tells her its Caroline Channing's horse and Peach's face lights up. She asks how they know each other and she says that Caroline is her AA sponsor.

They go over to meet Peach, Caroline is wearing a trash bag as cold weather armor and her boots. She realizes that TV crews are there, so she takes off the bag, fluffs up her necklace and takes her Brian Atwood pumps out of her purse. She comes prepared! She goes in to meet Peach and Peach says "thank you for coming" and she says "thank you for having me" and Peach talks about how happy she is to have met Caroline and get her horse because of her drunk servant, Max. Servant really? Is she that daft?

Chestnut is over at the stable and they have to say goodbye for now. Max has a tender moment with the horse as she says goodbye and tells her that she is fuzzy. She also has their weird obsession with kittens singing and ringing doorbells.

No extra money in the fund, minus Chestnut and a few minor laughs. Heartwarming, yes? Funny, not so much.

Illumination

HIMYM is getting pretty serious nowadays. I know they throw some comedy in there, but it seems like the story lines are not as light and airy as they once were. Let's dig in.

We start off with a new set of future children, Robin's. She is telling them the story of how she met their father. It goes back to the bathroom scene where she tells Barney she is preggo. He reacts badly "maybe you are just fat" and she punches him. He does this a few more times, a few more punches, until he begs not to get hit again. They go to the doctor to get a test and they find out she is not pregnant. They do a dance for joy with music from his ipod and the doc dances too.

She goes home to do things that pregnant women cant. She drinks scotch, has a cigar and eats sushi. She gets a call from the doc that she needs to come back in. She finds out that she can never have children.

from hitfix.com

Over at the Erickson's, Marshall is going to put his new suburban neighbors to shame by decorating his house. He gets up on the roof and sees a neighborhood kid Scott, asking if he can help since his dad is so busy. He then calls him Mr. E which makes Marshall smile. He is an adult now. Funny enough, Marshall drops his cell phone, Scott kicks the ladder so he is trapped on the roof and throws a house party as him and his friends dance and eat a sandwich. Nice with keeping the continuity.

Meanwhile, Lily is back registering for baby gifts at "We B Babies" with Robin and Barney. When they thought they were pregnant, they thought it was all cute until Barney runs into his old bro Insane Duane. Who is now married with 4 kids to the girl he picked up at the bar with one line "boner" and now goes by the name Sane Duane. Barney is applaud and doesn't want kids even more.

The second time they go registering, Robin is the only one who knows she cant have kids. She thought that was what she wanted, but now that its not on the table she is horrified. She is so upset, but doesn't want the gang to get too concerned (Ted will try to comfort her, Barney will try to make her laugh, Lily will get too upset and Marshall will try and question it all) so she tells them she is too tall to be a Canadian pole vault jumper.

Lily goes back home and sees Scott, gives him a $50 for helping out - little does she know she text her boobs to him not Marshall and Ted tries to cheer Robin up. She says he cant cheer her up and that is that. He even goes as far to light the entire apartment up in Christmas lights and does something really amazing for her. They hug.

She takes her carton of Egg nog and sits in the snow on a bench in Central Park as she goes back to the future kids as they disappear, because she says she never had them and they are imaginary.

My heart breaks for Robin. Does yours?

Kardashians in the Hamptons

It's like a bad car crash you cannot look away from. I need to see how Kim's marriage unraveled.

The Klan is supposed to go to the Hamptons to see Scott's parents. Khloe tells Kim some wifely advice that she should use this time to go to Minnesota to see her man. She is thankful, but not for too long. Khloe goes to say goodbye to Kim before they head off to the Hamptons and Kim literally flips out on her saying she woke her up. Now, I have been there before. But Kim is SO spoiled that she continues this fight with Khloe, telling her she is jealous of her and she doesn't want her to succeed and calls her an ugly troll and some other harsh things.

from eonline.com

They get to the Hamptons and Scott is nowhere to be seen. Kourtney tells everyone that every time she is over his parents house she "rearranges" things for them. Little do we know that means she throws their shit out. She even goes far enough to throw out some antique chess set and Scott's mother is truly upset, but too nice to say anything. Makes you wonder if Scott was adopted. There is NO way he would let that shit fly. Mason of course steals the show.

Back over in Minnesota, Kim and her hubby are cooking and relaxing by the pool. She begins to tell him she is not ok with this living in other cities thing and he just plays with his hair (are you seriously playing with your hair?) and moves to the other side of the room. She begins to pack up and start crying. I think at this point they are both realizing they shouldve hashed these things out before they said I do. He tells her that he loves her and doesn't want to see her cry. They decide to give NY one more chance. They say they can change the living arrangements. From the get go, they shouldve lived alone. I don't know why the Klan always has to shack up together.

Kourtney tells Scott she wants a date night and he starts to be really happy. Khloe goes back to NY and when Kim gets back they are not speaking. It is totally awkward. My personal point of view is that Khloe let Kim know, she gave up a lot of her life to be on Lamar's schedule and Kim doesn't want to give up her life, she is selfish and taking it out on little sister Khlo.

This epsidoe made me think that Kris really isnt as bad as some people are making him out to be. Is it Kim?

Charlie Rhodes comes undone

Brunch at the Humphrey's townhouse consists of waffles and champagne. We learn that Lily is throwing Charlie a coming out party. Max is still lingering around trying to sell Charlie's story to anyone who will listen. Of course, he tries to sell it to Nate who denies him.

Some boring story line about Nate and his cousin Tripp and Grandfather which leads into Max trying to sell the story to Tripp. I can only imagine that Tripp gave him money and that's why in the end of the episode Max leaves town. Back to the middle.

Blair is being stalked by paparazzi and goes to take refuge in Brooklyn at Dan's. Gossip Girl gets her own scoop since nobody is sending tips in anymore. Blair calls Chuck and asks if he can ever love another man's baby. He tells her that she should be with the baby's real father and she hangs up crying.

Dan tells Serena he is going to confess to Blair that he is in love with her, but Serena is in love with Dan still so she tries to sabotage this by helping Louis find Blair. Chuck also goes to find Blair and she is missing. Little did we know Dan did the right thing and brought Blair to a secret room at the Empire where Charlie's party is being held, so that Chuck and Blair can reunite. Confused?

The party is glamorous and Charlie looks stunning. Nate runs into Max outside the party and learns that he wants to try and expose her inside. He warns Charlie and she tips off GG that Blair and Chuck are there, so that the party will get shut down.

from cwtv.com

In the secret room for the 5 minutes they have, Blair and Chuck say all the things we were hoping they would say. They say they love each other and he will love the baby even though its not his and they should be together and he and she is sorry. They go out the back with Nate to a private town car. Nate jumps in one and they jump int he other. As they drive off, you see a gas leak in the garage.

The cars are off and the paps are chasing Blair/Chuck's car dangerously on motorcycles trying to get photos. Inside the car they are talking about where they will live and how she will call off the wedding and they kiss and they are in love and BOOM. Crash. Of course.

End scene is at the hospital where we are told that Blair is getting better but Chuck is not doing well. We are all sobbing and Charlie is sobbing as Rufus comes over to see the deal. She tells him its all her fault and she is a fraud. She calls Carole and says she needs to get out of here and leaves the scene.

We end with Diana getting a call from Chuck's uncles telling her about Chuck in the hospital. Um is she the mother? i thought his mother was the other lady! So confused.

Chuck of course CANNOT die. This is not the final season, like so many other of my favorite shows. But I am pretty sure that Blair will lose the baby. Aren't you?

It all comes undone...

Why are all these mid-season finales happening? I cannot wait until January!!

Over at the lane, Bree is spiraling out of control. None of her friends are talking to her and she has taken to the bottle. So much that she gets wasted by herself and rudely joins a bunch of girls out for girls' night with the offering of a bottle of champagne. By the end of the night she is calling one of them Lynette and someone stumbles into Ben's apartment. Renee of course later sees this and gets upset that her man is cheating on her. Way to make more enemies Bree!

Over at the station, Chuck is stirring the pot. He calls the girls in for separate "friendly" conversations. Susan gets so nervous she wants to go to New York to paint for a few weeks. Lynette plays it cool and Gaby smirks at the photo of her dead stepfather. She claims that Carlos is drinking because he cheated on her. She goes to rehab to warn Carlos of the new story and needs to sneak in. She sneaks in with a family that is trying to get their son to check in.

from abc.com

Chuck latches on to Gaby's smirk, since he is all trained in mannerisms and does some diggings. He finds out she is the dead guy's stepdaughter and tells her she better get a lawyer and come in to see him in the station or he will send a squad car. Gaby calls rehab to find out that Carlos has checked out.

Lynette knows that she may get caught so she needs to let Tom know in case they take her away. Of course, Tom and his new gf are on their way to Paris, drinking champagne in a private lounge and kissing. Lynette follows to Tom to the bathroom and lets him know that he cant go away because she is an accessory to murder. Jane walks in and sees them talking and flips out. She loses her cool (hello, back off lady, Lynette is super important!) and Tom tells her they cant go. She takes the tickets and goes and tells him to meet her there. I love that their relationship hit a snag. I am still rooting for Tom and Lynette to get back together.

Bree goes to Chuck's office and tells him that she will admit to everything if he just leaves her friends alone. His claws begin to show when he tells her that he wants her to hurt like he hurt. He wants to take her friends away from her. He is pretty successful in this, when all of her friends have left her and left each other.

Chuck goes to tell Ben that they found a phone signal of the dead guy on his construction site and that this will shut down the project. Ben says its because he is out to get him because of Bree and then leaves Ben's house. Bree checks into a motel with a bottle of booze and a hand gun. She envisions Mary Alice and talks to her old dead friend.

We see Bree get into her car, we know Carlos is missing and we know Ben is mad. We see a racing car run over Chuck and only assume he is dead. But who hit him? Your guess is as good as mine. At least old Chucky is dead, that's a plus!